As current history shows only too clearly, the power-hungry we shall always have with us. Stalin, Mao, Hitler, Queen Victoria, Genghis Khan, Napoleon, Robespierre, Julius Caesar, Alexander the Great… Ah, the list is dismally long, isn’t it, and getting longer by the day.

But how do WE denizens of the new millennium stack up, greedy-tyrant-wise, with those who’ve come so bloodily before?

Here’s your chance to find out.

We may be premature since certain contemporaneous tyrants have not yet run out their careers. Who knows what surprises they still have in store for the planet before they call it a day?

But pride in the achievements of our own era compels us to undertake this preliminary survey.

All tyrants share certain qualities, but obviously some are better at, say, genocide, while others excel in propaganda, or what have you.

After a close study of the historical record we’ve concluded that there are in fact seven salient characteristics by which any dictator worth his or her salt would want to be judged.

     1. Best National Anthem.
     2. Best Propaganda.
     3. Best Book.
     4. Best Machiavellian Slyness.
     5. Best Population Control.
     6. Best World Domination.
     7. Best Accumulation of Wealth.